Right Listening by Mark Brady, Ph.D.

Provider: Mark Brady, Ph.D.
Product: A downloadable version of the book Right Listening
Description: A short book that evolved from teaching listening skills to aspiring clinical psychologists for more than a dozen years. The book offers 52 specific skills and awareness exercises that will help you take on skillful listening as a contemplative practice.
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“When I ask you to listen and you start giving advice, you have not done what I have asked. When I ask you to listen and you start telling me why I shouldn’t feel the way I do, you are invalidating my feelings. When I ask you to listen and you start trying to solve my problems, I feel underestimated and disempowered.

When I ask you to listen and you start telling me what I need to do, I feel offended, pressured and controlled. When I ask you to listen, it does not mean I am helpless. I may be faltering, depressed or discouraged, but I am not helpless. When I ask you to listen and you do things that I can and need to do for myself, you hurt my self-esteem.


But when you accept the way I feel, then I don’t need to spend time and energy trying to defend myself or convince you, and I can focus on figuring out why I feel the way I feel and what to do about it. And when I do that, I don’t need advice, just support, trust and encouragement. Please remember that what you think are irrational feelings always makes sense if you take the time to listen and understand me.”


~ An adolescent’s plea to adults, from the book, “Right Listening,” by Mark Brady