Reflective listening is very simple. So simple that it’s easy to skip it and go directly to addressing the issue. Afterall, when a fight is happening we want it to stop immediately, right? We’re here to get answers and obviously if I address the content of what you’re telling me you’re upset about then you’ll feel better and we can move on, right? Wrong. As it turns out, many if not all of us have a strong desire to be listened to.
More than having our problems fixed, we want to feel heard. More than being given some thing that we’re asking for, we want to be listened to. More than hearing “I’m sorry”, we long to hear “I accept you just as you are.” Reflective listening can offer all of that.